--------------------------------------------------------
|
Wednesday, December 31, 2003 i am: tired watched another few eps of one piece. i juz realised i haf a weird body. as in, not mainly wad u c. budden it wuz like, either e bbq + laksa at 1am wuz a lot, or e determination not 2 borrow frm trowaman wuz overwhelming. y? cuz i din eat breakfast, nor lunch, n onlee ate dinner for e 2nd day. wth. n i wuzn't hungry during tt time. haishz. i wanna go back japan le. nvm. pray i do superbly well, i.e. all a1s, hehe, not so probable, n then mi n daniel wanted 2 ask others. to go japan wif us. ppl like pehpeh. zul. hazmi. hulin. more ppl 2 tok kok. dreams can b realised. i'm not blindly wasting mi life. i wanna b e veri best. no, not e pokemon song. i wanna b e veri best. e veri best paeleontologist. get tonnes of cash. then come back, get a big plot of land. build a great big hse. then mi whole family can live together. be it partially or greatly extended family. or it can juz b tt build up a condo. then mi frenz n i can stay together. hehe. i dunno. but wad i noe iz. i'd rather die than c others die. last thing. lee hoo. if u evr read this. e lower post iz true. hehe. n play AT b4 e 2nd. otherwise kenot le... tehgo walked into the light @ 12/31/2003 01:53:00 am -+-+-+-+- |
|
Tuesday, December 30, 2003 i am: having conflicting feelings 2 play or not 2 play? haishz. superbly sleepy as sed juz now. juz rmbed after posting. i wuz chao sleepy. cuz lee hoo fell asleep on e pillow on mi leg. so not 2 wake him, i slept, sitting up, letting mi right leg dangle off e bed. then aboz 1-1.5 hrs later, he woke up, dunno y, so i cud move mi leg. he wuz looking for his specs, which i put on e ledge of e headboard. then i realised, he took 2/3 of e bed. so i slept on e 1/3 left. amazing but true. mi legs i stretched n put them behind his back tt area. so enuff space lah. at aboz 2+ i woke up. freezing. juz shivering involuntarily. then i went next door 2 get a blanket. lo n behold. lee hoo moved up. bo space le. tmd. then zul n hulin shared 1 bed. e bed 2 lee hoo's right. left wuz mattay n yehmin. so again. since e day b4, mattay took mi space. which wuz next 2 aleck. so then i went 2 sleep on e floor. freezing mi ass off. cold cold floor. wrapped miself up like a cocoon, so i dun touch e floor. used mi beeg blue bag as a pillow once more. since it has mi clothes. at aboz 6+, hazmi n ahanong came in. waking up e psls n aleck 2 go for psl meeting. in e process. i woke up. well cuz i dun sleep easy aniwhere but home. waited for zul n hulin 2 leave. hulin left his gatsby on e bed. passed it to him, n passed out on e bed next 2 lee hoo. then lee hoo thot i slept on e bed e whole nite. sum reason, i wake up when i feel sum1 iz gonna wake mi up. e word iz gonna, not yet. so i awoke frm sub-consciousness. n then heard lee hoo getting up. first thing he sed wuz "tehjo mojo" then he paused, then sed "wake up" after tt, he asked ppl wake mi up. i stretched n tried to continue sleeping. in e process, i stretched too violently. ended up punching e wood above mi head. mattay woke up, i mean gerbert wuz waking mi up at tt time i feigned going back 2 sleep ok i then yehmin threw a pillow in mi face. i picked it up n swung it overhead. i dunno where it hit. i wuz still mostly asleep. then gerbert sed sth like, "teja iz like joey, sleep so much" at those words, mi left eyelid snapped open. then lee hoo n gerbert were looking at mi. then they sed "oh, awake le" haishz. oh yarhz. hulin wuz laffing at lee hoo b4 he went 2 sleep. cuz lee hoo when sleeping, kept wiggling his butt. periodically. hulin laffed. then asked mi wth iz lee hoo doing. i supposed he wuz cold. or... i dunno. he wuz dreaming? but he wuz wiggling his butt e whole nite. first he wuz on his side. so he looked like his leg wuz twitching. then he rolled over, head still on mi leg, n ended up, wiggling his butt, his elbow like gripping e pillow. oso mi leg. then i cudn't move at all if not i'll jab him n wake up e peaceful sleeper. or fitful. whichever u wanna think. aiyarhz i think it wuz e best thing this hol for mi. cuz mi klaz bbq sucked. so 3p's chalet not bad. helped mi get mi mind off sum things. things i dun wanna admit. dun wanna think it true. thanks 3P. real thanks. tehgo walked into the light @ 12/30/2003 08:18:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
|
juz back frm chalet 7 hrs ago. used by hankit. tmd. ask mi bring ps2 wif mi. we were playing BR4 for e whole damn day, thnx 2 e fact i forgot tt i lent mi other vs games off. tmd. then boring like crap. ok so i thrashed them, but tt's bcuz i haf e game. n played frm BR, so... aniwaez. wad mi sensei sed kinda affected mi. he wuz going on aboz how, all of us haf sum "i hate u" feeling towards sum1. so he wuz saying tt last time he wuz liddat until his sensei talked aboz hatred... blah blah blah, then i think aboz sunday sch. how they sed, repay gd wif gd, and evil wif gd. bcuz when u repay hatred wif hatred, u juz get more hatred, but if u repay hatred wif luv, e hatred will go away. so i try n b nice 2 all ppl in e world le. even stop thinking how moronic, a piece of shat george w bush iz, yeah. so i will not hate. dislike but tolerate still can. no hate. tehgo walked into the light @ 12/30/2003 07:52:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
|
Tuesday, December 23, 2003 i am: making helluva noise aboz e goddamn eyelid infection haishz. long time nvr blog. like, 20 days? still can't get over e loss of mi grandpa. mi last surviving grandpa at tt. evrytime i think aboz wad he did 4 mi, i wanna cry. sumtimes i pushed him away. tt makes mi feel worse than scum. i cry silently. i seemed to haf lost sumthings. i feel i haf like, lost e ability 2 think straight, when e word grandpa comes to mind. i haf lost too much. 7 luved ones. now i'm half blind. almost. thanks 2 e eyelid infection. tt's like, almost closing mi whole eye. hope it goes away soon, or then i'll hafta go for op. so many things i wanna do. juz 2 avoid e sadness. cancer. sed he had 3 mths left. turned into 2 wks. wth. y? ok, gd thing iz i passed shodan. got mi hakama liaoz. quite big =_= mebbe i'll try out SRW Impact. or continue FFX-2. but for e time being, i gotta get lotsa rest. or risk mi eye. =_=;; tehgo walked into the light @ 12/23/2003 07:25:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
|
Tuesday, December 02, 2003 shit. long time no blog. ok mebbe i din wanna blog. not yet. i din wanna read it. i wanted 2 deny its existence. but no. it's there. juz there. i can't avoid it, i can't look away. mi grandpa has cancer. wad m i 2 do? we haven't told him. yet. e doc sez let him enjoy his life. his last 3 mths. n guess wad? mi grandpa's intestines got infection, so inflamed, cannot... u noe. defecate properly. n e worse part is. he likes 2 eat. so now how? n summore he looks worse. will i get cancer 2? mebbe. hu noez? it's like, i wanna cry, but i not supposed 2. n i dun want anibodie 2 c. yet. it's juz so... mi grandpa has alwaez been nice 2 mi. mebbe it's bcuz i'm e youngest grandson. until 2000. hehe. mi other younger cousin born. it's like, i heard his report. cancerous tumour arnd his liver/kidney(forgot :p) intestines inflamed. jaundice. swollen feet, = kidney probs. n another thing. how can tt happen 2 a single person? now mi grandpa juz feels... lonely? n he is in hosp. like all old ppl, he wants out. so we gonna bring him back 2 mi grandma's hse. on wed. u noe wad? i wish i'd die normally like now. bcuz i can't take e deaths. it's juz too much. e sadness i feel is overwhelming. i'm at a loss. n mi oldest aunt, hu migrated 2 australia, is crying n crying, cuz she reeli can't find any goddamn flight back, n if it's 3 mths, it wuz sed last mth. which = january it's aboz his limit. n she can onlee find a flight on e 13th of jan... i hate this. i juz hate it so much. tehgo walked into the light @ 12/02/2003 10:46:00 am -+-+-+-+- |