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Thursday, April 28, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Guilty Gear XX - The Original Shin Getter Robo - Dragon things mite b getting better. i dunno. i juz noe that i'm now feeling lonely even tho i can talk to my frenz online or via hp or sms. mebbe it's e change. e change of from seeing them evryday to seeing them mebbe once a wk, once a mth. e change is too big for me, n i'm slowly losing it. i miss all my frenz over n over again. mebbe that's y i'm sick. i haf nfi. i guess i haf 2 take evryting one step at a time. like go to sch more for one. it's so tiring to not see ppl i'm accustomed to. wanker, chiang, trowa, all those ppl in 3q/4q... i step into class, i see eddy, jason, weikiat, shengle, gary. e early birds. then at 7 more ppl come in. pehpeh, wanker, chiang, wl, edmond, joshua. n then e late ppl come. trowa, ..... trowa... i can't tink of ani1 else!! lol!... yeah. n it's a class i've missed. e dragon pic, our graffiti, e "brick wall" behind, madmaas coming in n being retarded in e morning, then et coming in n talking for like 10 mins then rushing out for class... these memories keep ringing in my head. sometimes i dream them over n over again, n i wake up wondering y didn't i work harder. y didn't i choose better. y didn't i do so many things that could've changed what i m, where i m now... haii... it hurts... tehgo walked into the light @ 4/28/2005 06:21:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Tuesday, April 26, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Guilty Gear XX - Momentary Life Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Proud of My Loneliness Aura Battler Dunbine - Dunbine Tobu Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Bad Friends Hikaru no Go - Sincerely hmm it's not so bad as it seems izzit? mi frenz r there wif me. i feel happy that they r. to me, i'm so simple i juz feel happy liddat. i'm seriously juz that bochap that even if mi frenz dun ask me out, i'm juz that. it hurts sometimes. but then. now i'm almost at e end of caring. i found out my neighbour is in sr too. e neighbour i played alot wif since pri sch. so sr isn't that bad now izzit... n i swear my com is reading my mind -_-.. as soon as i typed in bochap, i got e 2nd song. wtf. tyco or? aniwae. yeah i'm enjoying class now. not sch but juz class. my class roxxors n is damn fun. my class makes life in sr easier. i feel totally down in sr cuz i'm no longer wif u guys. n all i can think of is. what's dings having now? or is sinchi on break? or mebbe gary's doing sth weird again hhaha. or did trowa pon again? or is difei like ponning sch juz to see janice? i don't want sr to rip out my 4 yrs of life. i will alwaes love all e ri guys cuz they made mi life light up. n i m frm draco hse =) aniwae yeah... i'm nt interested in joining any cca now. seriously no mood at all. mebbe in may i mite join like wtf mind games club aka bridge/chess/checkers club. bcuz i dowan to waste my time.. 1730 1730 1300 1730 1515. my ending times daily. zzzzz. oh woopee. i get scolded again. and again. and yet again. i dunno when this shit will end. it's like a daily ritual now. i get scolded, i "listen", n tell them go away. i feel totally drained upon reaching home. then i go bathe, n think, hmm mebbe we'll play together again, then i'll perk up abit n wait to play wif mi frenz. even after a long day like today, i still wanna dota even tho i got shitloads of work left. call me selfish, but i dowan to lose my frenz. i reeli reeli reeli dowan to b forgotten. being forgotten is one thing i nvr want to b. cuz i rmb in like kindergarten? i had this fren like reeli close. but either way, we lost touch. and our friendship was forgotten. it's worse than being dead. it's like u nvr existed. n that is scary. yet i see my will withering away. i perk up when i'm together wif frenz. but then again, i come home n feel lost. i talk to my cousin more often. but hey. zzzz. it doesn't feel e same u noe. n difei wanna jio my cousin so i shud go suicide on him hahahahaha!... oh n hu cares what i wud feel? i'm no1 to my family. my mom sent mi an sms during lecture "grandaunt juz died" like wtF? i was stunned cuz a) i didn't noe she was that ill. b) hello some1 in my family juz died n my mom sounds as if nth happened. shit there's PI to hand up 2mr... =(... aniwae yeap. one blow after another. life is so kind. mebbe i'll look forward to going out wif lee hoo this fri or next ba. life needs change. n fuk u whoever thinks i can take all this shit u throw at me at once. pls remind me wtf i did to deserve this much. tehgo walked into the light @ 4/26/2005 07:42:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Monday, April 25, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Full Metal Panic Fumoffu - Kimi ni Fuku Kaze D.N.Angel - Shiroi Yoru (Acoustic Version) Kidou Senshi Gundam 0079 - Ai Senshi Gensoumaden Saiyuki Reloaded - Don't Look Back Again Full Metal Alchemist - Mienai Yume Full Metal Panic - Tomorrow Guilty Gear XX - Simple Life Guilty Gear XX - Nothing Out of the Ordinary Kidou Senshi Gundam W - Cry for the Dream Fushigi Yuugi - Tokimeki no Doukasen Kidou Senshi Gundam Victory - Stand Up to the Victory D.N.Angel - Shiroi Yoru Brain Powerd - In My Dream Bt'X Neo - A Piece of the Sun Guilty Gear XX - Missing.. zzzzzzz. i read pehpeh's playlist n i recognize all but 1. that's cuz i lost all e rest n m too lazy to do anithing. lol. aniwae. i felt totally crushed. depressed. empty. unwanted. w/e. after my father crushed my com abilities, then promptly blamed me for my sis leaving e hse cuz i quarreled wif her on my party day, i mean like, that wuz supposed to b my day n all e rest can juz go away pls. n i'm scolded for getting into sr. i'm scolded for having a headache. "rmb i told u long ago u will sure get it one. juz enjoy e pain la" that's exactly wad my mom told me. my family loves me alot i'm sure. i love my cousin tho. she gave me a nice card n chocs for my bdae. i love my cousin =) she's like e only one i will talk to in e family. evry1 else is juz. u're dumb n useless u got 9 pts n went into sr. u laffed at ur eldest sis for getting into chung cheng high, u laffed at ur 2nd sis for getting into sr, n look where u r now noob. e immense pressure is like. i dunno. after tt, i juz went up to my room to cry. bcuz i've reached my limit. i mite've cried sat nite if not for e fact my frustration went to rage instead of e usual frustration to crying cuz i can't do shit to my family. "be a man. do teh rite thing" yeah n den i can't touch my parents cuz they're mi parents, n i can't touch my elder siss cuz they're girls. last nite was like, just it. i totally wanted to juz pop pills n sleep my life away. i told whoever i needed to tell i wanted to die, then took e pills up into my room. it's like, what's there to live for. my friends r there for me alwaes. i noe that. but this shit is like hell evryday. if i wasn't online daily trying to live sanely, i think i mite've juz suicided earlier on in life. my nearest of kin isn't e kind to talk to when u're down. u'll juz feel worse. they'll put u down harder. no encouragement. any will juz turn into sth bad aniwae. to them i'm practically a failing tool for late life survival, that i'm supposed to make money n support my parents since a) i'm youngest, b) my sisses will b married off and who's left. c) i'm a guy n frm ri gep n supposed to b like some uber ceo of some company or w/e. my oldest dream of being a paeleontologist kinda sucks to mi aniwae. but who cares? no1 in my family rmbs why i watched land before time so much until i was 6. or why mi room has dinosaur soft toys. or why mi father, when he used to love me, bought mi a mountain of dinosaurs. nope. teja loves dinosaurs. n that was it. no reason as to why even. then my next dream is simple, yet i can make cash if i want to, n yet who cares? no1. my family thinks business management is e way to go. like fk that. i wanna b a vet. bcuz i love animals. alot alot. tt time mi wanker trowa went back to ri rj to look for teachers. we talked to et jcho n madmaas. n evry1 could see me being a vet than a businessperson. i dun mind being a teacher either. but i still love animals =) then again who cares. if i bring cash in, no noise. if i don't bring enuff, i'll juz get scolded aniwae. ppl like lee hoo, gary, takugo, dings were all encouraging. they sed i've still got them. but i was soon to lose it aniwae. like takugo sed, e bp is like one of e best bunch to b wif. i agree. but i dowan to lose it n y not juz end evrything now. i'm sure i'll hardly b missed. at tt time i was like totally in tears n running out of tissue. i cried as hard as when i lost my grandma last yr. seeing her long forgotten. not a single daughter-in-law cried. not a single son cried. i sat there n cried. how i felt that if not for dementia, she would still b loved. she was scolded daily, n i wondered if she evr knew us again. i rmb e mth b4, when she visited her, she rmbed me. teja. or kwang meng. i rmbed her too. i can't stop e tears coming out now. but i noe i loved her alot. my father turned away after seeing her lying peacefully on her bed. but tears nvr came out. i cried alot. as i did last nite. my cousin came in gave me her bdae present for me, n then tried to comfort me. all i hear i yelling downstairs aniwae. loving family no? then i sed it's ok nvm u juz go slp ba. then she went out. at tt time i was smsing n replying smses alot. then marian called. so we talked. n talked. for like 1 hr? n then i rmb her saying she suffers frm e middle child syndrome. hahahaha. n she can't do anithing to her sisters like me. she told me mebbe i shud juz leave e hse like my father told me to. but it's like, n she noez, there's nowhere to go. it's a bloody sunday nite. i'd reeli b imposing if i went to sum1's hse. n then she wuz like, sry but if i had brothers i'd open my hse to u. aniwae. then it's like, we juz talked it out. until i felt it all drain away. i reeli needed a hug then. so all i did was hug my bolster n cried n talked aniwae. we talked frm family to sch to frenz. i love marian. n then i responded to e smses. mebbe this fri i going wif lee hoo juz to see his church ppl or sth ba. i won't convert cuz alone that will b a super controversial thing. can u imagine? "hi i'm teja. oh teja's a buddhist name but i'm a christian." it will b juz not me. n now i'm juz ignoring most of my family bcuz if i talk or ignore, i get scolded aniwae. so hey. save breath dun talk get scolded n sit it out. i wish like this was WoW, n i could have an AFK tag so that they all won't bother me. but it isn't. this is hell. n as i thot abt it all, my headache grew worse. mebbe it's juz e immense pressure that's causing this headaches. but even as some of it subsided after we talked, it was juz killer. i slept a fitful slp last nite at any rate. i ponned sch cuz i reeli had 0 mood to go. sch called saying i mite not grad if i pon alot. aniwae. then it's like, i dreamt that rjc had spaces left n we could xfer in. i was like super happy n i saw all e familiar faces there. n then i woke up to a headache so great my eyes felt as if they were being forced out of their sockets. n then i thot abt e events that happend last nite. me getting scolded for like half an hr. then getting scolded e next 15 mins. n getting scolded another 10 mins b4 i juz stormed upstairs. getting blamed frm getting asthma to not being able to exercise to being dao to my family to sending my sis out of e hse. nth i do is rite, n evrything is my fault when it comes to it. marian was saying she felt a state of normalcy when she went to her frenz hse. i feel e same too. mebbe its cuz i dun haf a brother of same age. or a brother for that matter. i feel i have no1 to talk to. besides my friends and my cousins. which is y mebbe i so wanted my cousin to stay wif us when i was p5. mebbe. n like we sed. if i reeli had a brain tumor, i would juz end it then. i wouldn't bother to like go for treatment. i'd sit there. suffer like a few wks. n then die. bcuz then i'd b living for myself rather than for ani1 else in my family. i mean, i ask my mom get e router so that we all can use at e same time. then my sis juz dls n then screws up all other coms. fun no? n then when i ask her not to dl it's my fault. w/e la. evrything's my fault frm beginning to end. from getting 9 pts to getting into srjc n nowhere else. frm missing a 2nd tier jc like ac, to playing too much. we're all young. wouldn't we play? aniwae. yeah. thanks guys for being there. i hope so too gary ^^. it's juz so pressurizing n tiring. if i had a choice, i'd rather change sth at abt 4 yrs ago. then we'd all b together. juz like that. to stop e blows frm coming evry yr since sec 2. n e double blow that came this yr. thanks for all e nice cards. esp e one made by hk wl pehpeh n chin =) it's nice =) n i'm bloody wondering how it's like when i random my playlist i get mp3s suited to my mood at that time. i feel it's some1 helping me =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/25/2005 11:21:00 am -+-+-+-+- |
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Sunday, April 24, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Full Metal Alchemist - Heavenly Spirit i'm freaking tired but i can't get to slp. that suxxorss lol. aniwae. zzzz mebbe i go try ask ac again? i wanna b wif e rest... =(... sr suddenly seems to suck again =/ tehgo walked into the light @ 4/24/2005 06:15:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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i feel slightly better ha. but it'll come back soon =/ aniwae yeah. yest was quite fun. until my sis began bitching arnd. as they all saw. sry u had 2 see that =( aniwae. my life's full of shit zzzzzzzzz. i love my cousin she's mostly nice to me =) hahaha. i'm totally tired out frm last nite lol. wl wasted so long juz waiting for a run lol... hmmm... yeah i've nth much happy to blog abt. n i'd wanna stay happy so no sad stuff or angry stuff =) hee. oh. that reminds me. fuck j00 dings. lol. basket go anyhow tell my contacts stuff andden summore play arnd wif my nick. biatch. lol. tehgo walked into the light @ 4/24/2005 04:24:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Saturday, April 23, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny - Bokutachi no Yukue Card Captor Sakura - Hitotsu Dake Shaman King - Northern Lights Hikaru no Go - Sora i feel lost now. reeli lost at this point in time. r we truly drifting further n further apart? m i gonna lose my frenz of 4 yrs? will i? i feel like crying juz tinking abt it. i feel super depressed. reeli. juz that. 2day wasn't such a gd day. ok so we went to see gary eddy joyce wanling, oh yeah joyce wuz frm 3A2. amazingly i can rmb that -__-... aniwae yeah, then me hk pehpeh caiman dings ate at macs. sry sinchi =( sinchi left cuz he didn't reeli wanna eat macs and we ate at macs aniwae... then mi dings cai went to watch the interpreter. it was ok lol. aniwae that was like e onlee time i felt it was like days gone past. ok talking wif gary eddy edmond n joyce felt like it too. i'm sry i talk in that way, and i sound retarded. u all r so smart n got into ac wif pts ranging frm 8-11 ok? i'm stupid i went to srjc wif 9 pts. i'm still bitter abt it. who wudn't... aniwae. i still like my srjc class. it's fun, my tchers r nice. but i miss e old days. even going out wif ppl i knew not frm ri was fun... but these days r juz sapping all my happiness. supposedly i'm sick. or mebbe i'm juz totally depressed. evry1 thinks teja's dumb or fun to make fun off. i'm totally tired of it. usually i'd juz rebutt or sth. but now i'm juz too tired. i'm not gonna say fuck off cuz i'm not pissed. i'm juz in no mood to do much. even 2mr, or rather later, when they're all coming over for my bdae, i've juz lost all mood. it doesn't feel right anymore. even if i wanted to break off wif my frenz i've made over e past 4 yrs, i can't. i'd most likely lose a part of me if i do so. it mite b my illness juz killing my mood. i hope we'll all have fun later. like days of old. i miss all of u. an elephant nvr forgets. i doubt i ever will either. days of soccer, of remedials, of lessons. even tho it's like we're all having remedials, those days were fun. now for me it's like, i ended sch to begin sch again. and then we end sch once more, go ns, and start sch again. i'd thot mebbe if i wasn't stuck sumwhere where i only noe 1 or 2 ppl, and start afresh, it'll b ok. it isn't. n i'm not enjoying myself bcuz i'm feeling that sth is left out in my life. i wish i could turn back time. warn us. study like i've nvr done b4. and we'd all get our 6 pts n go rjc together. again. together. it hurts. and it'll nvr stop... tehgo walked into the light @ 4/23/2005 01:09:00 am -+-+-+-+- |
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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Don't Look Back Again One Piece - Kimi ga Iru Kara Mahou Sensei Negima - Happy Material been sick yest again -_- this thing is eating me up. i feel completely lethargic. but i've lost 6 kg altogether! gosu =) LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: oh u mean wad m i doing? LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: i thought u meant wad my sch is doing LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: ... LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: i will never do my work lolx.... =)) teHGo [- -]""" tehgo.blogspot.com wtf still sick... sick of being sickk says: . LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: but my classmate nice sia =)) teHGo [- -]""" tehgo.blogspot.com wtf still sick... sick of being sickk says: lol wtf LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: she offer to lend me her assignment to copy LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: but that's probably cos LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: my gd fren who's her gd fren told her to lolz trowa strikes again! i luv trowa's gosuness bwahahahahaha. aniwae. yeah. ............ LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: sian lor LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: my gd fren last tiem slack LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: now also starting to turn hardworking liao haish LIMBOON MARRIED GG says: but he nice guy trying to convert me lol... i've seriously nth to say now lolllll trowa is reeli teh secks lol aniwae. zzzzz e medicine my doc gave is super gosu. i feel slpy when i take it lol. "may cause drowsiness" it's like saying i piss at least once a day. redundant. +. it's strong lol -.-"" fell aslp playing com like at 9pm... hai i alwaes enjoy playing wif e ex-ri ppl as well as teh gosulator janice. i mean. deaceshooter aka difei =) all my classmates msned me like today. lol. "u coming back? tmr?" "u pon sch so long zzzzz" "hey. u're teja rite? u ever coming back?" gosu -_-... lol i'm known to pon liao TT aniwae. i hope to enjoy schooling once more... and suddenly i got a sudden itching to go aikido.. but not this sat. this sat is my sat. no way =/ i muz rmb that gosu phrase =) nanto. ka. naru. sa. =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/19/2005 10:59:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Monday, April 18, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed - Realize -Fly Into the Universe Mix- Guilty Gear XX - Momentary Life Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Open Up Your Mind Shaman King - With Determined Passion Full Metal Alchemist - Because You Were One Piece - Faith Brain Powerd - In My Dream hahahahah this is a small update =) i juz realised i've been v abstract abt evrything =) monday- slept all e way cuz i fell sick -____-... chatted wif alot of ppl via sms n msn b4 dotaing e nite away -____- tuesday- went for Team Excellence Camp!! ^^ it was totally fun n all =) met my classmates for e first time in 1 wk =X evrything was so totally funnnnn =) seemed better than wad i saw at o2 and in cjc's 1st intake -_- wednesday- DISC personality test results o.O D = Dominant, I = Influential, S = Stable, steady, C = Compliant i r teh SI =) which supposedly means i haf probs doing werk finish =X but i keep my frenz well =))) which is tru ok... this is supposedly used to help us find our PW grp better =) thursday- went for 2nd last day of our lecture weeks. ponned physics makeup to go to paintball. but sum arse pangsehed us so we couldn't go in e end. went to bowl/lan/play pool instead hahahahahah =) i love cosmo 6 =) friday- fainted in my room, like at 4 am i woke up finding sth. then juz fainted -_______-... woke up arnd half an hr later. not rmbing wtf happend. except my head totally hurt. like it was dipped in chilli sauce rolled around in ground peanuts, then throwed into e fryer and played as a squash ball. so i didn't see wanker off =((( then slept most of e day away saturday- gosulating goodness day =) met dathau dings sinchi pehpeh caiman to go pool luap joined us later at smrt itself with our lunch =) we played pool at first. then got sianned n went to play table tennis. then at 4 liddat we went to play badminton =) n then played until 6+ -______- lol at least i did some exercise than none ^^;; then went out wif pehpeh n dings for dinner. pehpeh gosuly forgot what he nided to do at 7.30... at 7.40 he exclaimed "FUCK I NIDED TO PICK UP MY SIS FRM TUITION" then chionged out of kfc. like wtf? then came back in 5 mins later sed he called her to tell her go home herself. lol -_-... pehpeh's gosu memory strikes again! sunday- woke up at 12 after ending a ZF run at 3 am wif pehpeh walt and 2 others. ran ZF and dotaed lol -_-... dowan to say anithing else abt that. oh. and then. gosuly my parents made me hate them. a more description following below "come wash dishes now!" -in middle of ZF run so i'm therefore bz- "later." "come cut grass now!" -still in ZF run. -_-...- "no." then my father thinking he's all that great. cancelled my family bday dinner for me. n that. was. e. last. straw. evrytime it's "TEJA DO THIS NOW" and when it's me "pls help me do this later" it's considered i'm nvr contributing. there's no such thing as an advanced warning. i have to do things on an immediate basis while i have to tell ppl things earlier, if not i won't get help at all. doesn't my family rock? gosu logic. and then they say "u're alwaes taking n nvr giving" i'm sure they'd do stuff on an immediate basis for me. fuck them all. even it's like, i ask e woman who claims to b my mom, "ma pls fetch me at 11.30 to bishan. it's 11 now." "ok i go finish w/e w/e first" at 11.30 "why must it b now? u luv e word later wad" wtf? didn't i tell her that half an hr in advance? seriously so cool. my parents and sisters' gosu logic. that i don't help alot. well cuz they want me to help like NOW! when i ask for help like 1/2 hr to 1 hr later, even like 2wks in advance for this yr's bdae, i'm now getting a "since u didn't do this, too bad" treatment. n i so love my family that they can all go rot in hell. now onto other stuffs lol =) ... i cheer up too fast when i think abt my frenz teh gosus =) alot of ppl haf commented i sound sad on my blog. hmmm mebbe it's juz me. like i throw out all my sadness here n b happy whereever i m wif my frenz =) gosu headache strikes again! aniwae yeah. major ouch -_- i miss my frenz daily cuz i wont b wif them as much as last 4 yrs but i like my new classmates =) they're all fun ppl =)) it's funny u think? i show super sadness here. or anger. or angst. w/e but i hopefully stay cheerful =) i hate bringing my sadness around =( i'd rather b perpetually happy, or die happily. than live a sad life drowning in sorrow aniwae yeah. i will do anithing in my power to ensure this sat will work! GOSULATED tehgo walked into the light @ 4/18/2005 01:01:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Friday, April 15, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Diana Ross - If We Hold On Together lol 2day is like a lot of ppl sick ahahahah me. pehpeh. jquek. and 2 of my classmates. sadly. 2day is e day wanker leaves T______T n i din see him off cuz i wuz reeli sick i fainted back into bed this morning. then told my mom my headache is teh killing me cuz it was -_-... andden i told wanker wad i wanted 2 tell him. n then i went back 2 slp. i hate being sick. i've lost 4 kg =) therefore i still got 20 left to lose to b of relatively ok weight. i've been thinking abt stuff lately. alot lol. that i can't slp either -.-"" for one... i think alot abt my frenz. n other frenz. =) and then there's this gosu gf shit that evry1 will ask me abt. it hasn't been gheyer than that lol =) esp dings ><... and sinchi >< there's not a moment when i'm missing my frenz company. ok there is when i'm wif them la hahahahaa. i rmb like. wanker, pehpeh, me. in e same row. pehpeh being e bastard blocking me frm talking to wanker. then wanker will try to punch pehpeh in e balls. hahahaha i miss that lol =) or like qixiang saying like "GG!" when he saw e hist prelim paper. or wl n his "NO GARY FUCK U !@$#%^&*^%$#@!" when gary starts doing farnie stuff to wl or garlic laffing at me laffing at e oral pics then pong laffing at me, i'm laffing at pong, and suddenly pehpeh starts laffing at both of us. then we nvr did stop laffing during english lol =p then there's e qn of getting a gf =( how many times u hear of ppl like getting together then less than 3 mths they break up. and get together wif sum1 else -_- i feel that being in a relationship is like sacred. bcuz it's supposed to mean u've found ur soulmate n not sum1 to try out and hurt =( haiii. it sucks to b hurt yepyepyep. will i evr find mine? idk at all =( i hope i will find e courage to ask sum1 out ^^;; lol this will nvr end in my head -_- last thing is quite farnie. even tho ppl will say it isn't -.- i've been getting frequent headaches they feel like beartraps r put on my head. they hurt like nuts. i feel nauseous at time too. i've been given a referral to e neurologist at ttsh this is so scary it's funny ehhehehe. i've been wondering what's it like to die. do we juz forget it all? do we juz sleep for eternity? like in e emerald dream? then i've also wondered what happens if i die i doubt any1 will b sad. =) wl will cheer i think. "yay no more retarded teja" have u ever felt like giving up? if i do have sth terminal to do wif my brain, i think i'll juz sleep it away. this is like e end of it all. to die early mite b a gd thing. i keep my memories of all of us safe. and then i'll die a happy man =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/15/2005 05:20:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Thursday, April 14, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Card Captor Sakura - Yoru no Uta w00t. didn't go paintball today =/ someone pangsehed us. tee tee. then no paintball. ends up we went bowling =) as well as lan + pool =)) my og n classmates r funnnnnn =) i think i mite like it here ^^ no1's calling me a retard no1 daos me like fuck and no1 treats me badly. it's gonna b funnnnnnnn to b in serangoon =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/14/2005 04:57:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Linda Ronstadt & James Ingram - Somewhere Out There Hilary Duff - The Tiki Tiki Tiki Room O-zone - Dragostea Din Tei  You are a Samurai. What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures] brought to you by Quizilla  Your element is Light: Innocent, beautiful, kind-hearted and pure. You are so sweet your almost angelic, you find joy in others happiness and cannot stand to see anyone in pain. You want to make everyone around you feel good about themselves and if someone is upset you can tend to become rather upset as well which means you are sympathetic and raise others above yourself. Being as kind and good-natured as you are people have most likely hurt you in the past but you pick yourself up every time. You may look fragile but you are stronger than most tend to see. Life is beautiful no matter how you look at it and you understand that people make mistakes, not everyone is perfect. You try to see the good in the bad which is a talent few posses, dont ever let anyone change you. You truly have a beautiful soul inside and a heart of gold. .:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers- brought to you by Quizilla  you represent the begining of life. you are bright and cheerful and love being who you are! What part of life do you represent? ( AWESOME anime pics ^_^) brought to you by Quizilla tehgo walked into the light @ 4/14/2005 04:57:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Diana Ross - If We Hold On Together  cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be close to your special someone and feel warm, comfortable, and needed What Sign of Affection Are You? brought to you by Quizilla  You're a very mellow, care-free person. Your exactly what calm, cool, and collected mean. You never overreact or panic in a bad situation and you always know what to do. Everyone goes to you for advice because you never lose your head so your very reliable. You tend to take everything in stride, like in school your moto is just sit back and relax not to say you dont pay attention and work, but you dont overexert yourself. Even though people come to you for counciling(sp?) you can still be very quite, your not good with making new friends, but your extremely close to the ones you have. Remember its ok to put your emotions out there even though there is a chance they might get hurt. Also in school sometimes its good to stress out a little, just because you think you dont need to study doesnt mean you should'nt, and also try to push yourself more even though you might be good where you are doesnt mean you can,t be better. Check out my new short story. Whats Your Personality(with PICS) brought to you by Quizilla  You hate not to love but you hate to fall in love. You can't help but sigh when you see to people kiss in the park and all. You don't like to go over board and believe in a small steady relationship at first so that it can grow. You also like to think that you can have that kiss that puts you into a portal and you can't get back until he/she stops. How much do you love? GOOD PICS brought to you by Quizilla fucking imba. i get like e same things i got last time =// aniwae it's gd to noe i haven't changed alot =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/12/2005 10:04:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Monday, April 11, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Disney - American Tales - Somewhere Out There Diana Ross & The Supremes - I Will Survive okay. i juz realised, even tho like, in e yr 2004, i wrote random spoutings. n i realised that one thing i noe was that, when i wrote this, i'm at home. home sucks cuz i'm alone. but i felt happy no matter where i was in 2004 cuz we were together. n that kept me happy. i still can't get over e fact we're separated now. i miss my frenz. making new frenz is teh tee tee ok. they already have their bunch. my bunch is in rjc acjc tpjc australia hci i found old quizzes n redid them for fun lol =/ last sat/sun was teh sex =) at wanker's hse againnn meeting teh frenz i haf. lessee... wl gary hk pehpeh dario trowa deace kiach ngiap poon shengle caiman sinchi rch lam joshchin went it was fun. i miss evry min of it. bcuz it was wif frenz. i hope we go dings hse soon ^^ aniwae. next sat is at my hse lol. i go call ppl soon =) tehgo walked into the light @ 4/11/2005 01:27:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Gravitation - Super Drive  You are Ifrit! You're a mainstay in everyone's party, even if you do have a breath problem. Ever steadfast, you reduce all but the toughest (or flame-retardant) foes to a pile of ash in moments. What Final Fantasy summon are you? brought to you by Quizilla  See what Care Bear you are. See what Care Bear you are.uh... gosu?  What color are you? (Anime Pictures) brought to you by Quizilla  Take the What Fruit Are You? test by Ellen! errrr.. isn't a lemon like some kinda porn story..?? =X  You're a fist fighter! You are really strong and beat up the enemy with your bare hands. Flying kicks, rushes, and kung-fu-like attacks are your specialty. You are fearless, passionate, and will take on anything. Fist fighters: Tifa Lockheart, Zell Dincht and Sabin Figaro. A cool Final Fantasy quiz: What type of FF fighter would you be? brought to you by Quizilla weird... -.-..  You represent... happiness. Boy, are you full of cheer or what...? You have a sunny disposition and enjoy trying to spread your happiness. You have a tendency to be a little hyper, but you have the ability to make your own fun no matter what. What feeling do you represent? brought to you by Quizilla i will hardly ever b hyper ok =/ tehgo walked into the light @ 4/11/2005 12:50:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Guilty Gear XX - Noontide One Piece - Bon Voyage  Your an electric Dragon! Well, Well, Well, Speedy! Electic dragons are just do darn quick, which means you must be quick at something. Whether its running, swimming, or answering questions, you are super speed. But of course, you have a craze for video games or computers. You can play amazingly at any game or at least try to. Go you! What elemental dragon are you? brought to you by Quizilla -.-.... wtf... i chose farnie stuff n get same as pehpeh i bet u quick is my temper haahhaahah  Your element is Fire. Like fire, you have a hot temper and you can be warm and loving as well and angry and wild. It all really comes down to what you are feeling. You have a lot of close friends who you are very protective over, and with your temper probably some enemies too. You are not Miss Popular in school since you are your own person and don't want to be forced into behaving this or that way. You are the untamed wild horse, the kind that everyone wants to catch. But you don't want to be tied down for the moment and just keep going with your little crushes. Your will is strong and if you set your mind to do something, you will most likely succeed. But beware, your friends may not always accept your mood-swinging behaviour. Even if you don't mean to be mean, they can still feel hurt. You just need to start thinking some things through before you do them, and not always jump in with so much courage. One day you may be hurt because of that, but then again, your element isn't fire if you start to analyse situations before you act. After all, your nature is to shoot first and ask the questions later. Rate and message! What is your element? [with pics + 7 outcomes + detailed answeres!] brought to you by Quizilla ... lol m i reeli liddat =/ we'll see in paintball next sun!  You are the Spirit of Love. You think around romance and are extremely compassionate. Whenever you want something you can get it due to your fiery passion. You can make friends quite easily, because peopole are attracted to your obvious good nature. You will have no trouble in finding a life partner and will be very happy. Which stunning spirit of emotion are you? NEW AND IMPROVED! (amazingly beautiful anime pics!) brought to you by Quizilla they r teh bullshitting sia. lol ^^;; tehgo walked into the light @ 4/11/2005 12:14:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Wednesday, April 06, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Card Captor Sakura - Koko ni Kite Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed - Daitan ni Ikimashou ~Heart and Soul~ Mahou Sensei Negima - Kizuna i feel crushed. srjc juz sucks. my og has been fun. they're nice. but e sch juz sucks. i'd rather b in ri for 16 yrs than b in srjc for 1.5 yrs... i miss all my friends. pehpeh bonks sinchi jong garlic caiman in acjc. yabbers dings wl hentai eddy danli moski pong n so many others in rjc heck dario amos in ajc, wanker in australia andrew chua diwei shijun in hc, trowa in tp we're all over e place. but there's one that wasted his life. me. y? bcuz now i'm alone. n i din intend it this way. soon i'll b forgotten. so easily. like, that kid nvr existed. *poof* sure i mean, paintball's sth to look forward to. but it juz sucks u noe. noeing we'll haf not a hell lot of chance to b 2gether later on in life. i reeli reeli miss my friends... tehgo walked into the light @ 4/06/2005 09:06:00 pm -+-+-+-+- |
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Saturday, April 02, 2005 LiStEninG tO: Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Solitude One Piece - Kimi ga Iru Kara Hunter X Hunter - Inori Yuusha Ou Gaogaigar - Yuusha o Tanjou Fushigi Yuugi - Tokimeki no Doukasen Mazinger Z - Ending Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed - Invoke i've gotten over pretty much anithing now i think. but aniwae. my og's real cool hahahaha. even tho i haf nfi wad's their names, they still treat me as if i was there since day 1. so nice ... aniwae. yeap apparently i ponned taekwondo today. i finally realised i dowan taekwondo. waiting for rugby on mon. there is no more boredphuckers near me. which juz sucks ok -_-.... it hurts to rmb.. it seems i'm losing most of my ri friends fast. mebbe i'm not supposed 2 b wif them? i dunno ok... mebbe it's destined this way. hmm apparently got sum ex 6-03 person frm rosyth in my og. i somehow recognise her, n she asked me if i frm rosyth. i sed yeah, 6-09. but apparently, after that short convo, we still dunno each others names -.-""" lol i'm sorry i'm not that fun to b wif ok =( i'm not even like gary T_T yah aniwae. there's another 9 pter in srjc! my ogmate who i dunno who she is anyway -.-"""""""""""""" i found out a few things in srjc. a) e tchers r quite slack. but will catch u for ponning -_- b) there's like 20+ diff sch's students in srjc c) 75% r chio or quite chio, 10% r butches n 15% r fugly d) sch hasn't started when most jcs haf started sch liao -.-" e) their layout kinda sucks f) wire cutters prove helpful in srjc. there's wire fences evrywhere g) some of e fences lead to like all e diff roads arnd srjc h) srjc was north zone champs for soccer last yr o.O i) srjc's canteen is small but evrything is heavily subsidised or sth. j) srjc's j1s r super humji. ~300 of us stoning at gate waiting for 1 oclock, when if we wanted to chiong can zhao liao -_- i mean. how many students can 2 teachers catch -.-"" anyway. yest's april fool's day was boring. i dun rmb anithing lol. evry1 was so stoned. i actually went wif my og, stood there n talked cock. and still i dunno any1's names -.-"""""""""""""""""""""""""""" hai. i rmb e days of happiness. n now i'm thrown out of it. but i'll still b happy for no reason at all. cuz i've got some friends elsewhere. and it's all i have left to stay sane. tehgo walked into the light @ 4/02/2005 10:22:00 am -+-+-+-+- |